New Perspective

 

“Ahh math, pasakit sa buhay!” “Why do we have to study all of this? Nagagamit ba lahat sa buhay to? I mean, it’s not like I’m going to say I have 4 squared kids or stuff like that right?” “Why is it like this? No matter how hard I try, math keeps failing me? Kapag confident ako na kaya ko, babagsak ako.” “Maaaaath.” “It’s too hard for my life!” These are just some of the things I hear from people when we talk about math.

Most people have a crazy argument that there is no need for us to immerse ourselves into the Nitti gritty of Mathematics because it would never be applied in our daily activities. Ooops! Is that really what it is? Well, if we figure it out, everything we do involves math from the moment we set the alarm of our clock before going to bed. ‘Til the moment we get home from school or from work. Setting the alarm involves numbers, taking a shower also involves math when we set the heater of our shower. Having a balanced breakfast also involves math. As our dad drives us to school, math is also involved in terms of setting the speed, loading up, etc. As we get off the car in school, we keep up with time to get from one class to the other, as we have meals in between classes, we consider the amount of the meal based on our daily allowance. As we make phone calls, we keep up with the number of minutes provided by the call plan that we have with our mobile phones. As we get to the end of each term, we look forward to a fair computation of our grades. Looking forward to getting a job after earning a degree, we take into consideration the package to be offered to us by various employers based on the skills that we have and based on our lifestyle.

Sometimes I wonder. Why is it that math has such a negative impression to people? Where is this all coming from? I mean, Is it just because of the hard lessons and low grades? But of course! Duh! Who am I kidding? Of course it’s about all of this kind of stuff. Being students, getting high grades is very important to us and most people see math as a hindrance to reaching that goal, but is it fair to have such kind of perception?

In my case, well, I’ve always loved math since I began school. I was always one of the few students who excel in math. I was usually privileged to be part of inter-school math programs.  This is the reason why I question myself a lot nowadays. I often ask myself the question ‘WHY’. It seems that things have turned out the other way around. Why now? Why now when I am in my College education already?

The diagnostic test that we took back in the first semester, which would determine if we would be kept in Math 11 or demoted to Math 1, is actually the first math test that I failed. And naturally, I was so disappointed. I began asking myself, “Why now when passing the test determines my fate?” But it didn’t put me down. I took the challenge. I took it as a chance of learning more things. I saw it as a privilege. I believe that everything happens for a reason. And fortunately, things went well. I have learned a lot from the experience. Every bit of it had great impact on me.

This semester, I finally made my way into Math 11, the course where I am first placed. And I was thankful for everything. Indeed, everything happens for a reason. I’ve always believed that a ‘NO’ gives way to a greater ‘YES” in the future. The ‘NO’ back then, back when I failed that diagnostic test brought me here to this great Math 11 class.

Here I am now, I am brought to Math 11 Z. My impression of the class back then, during the first day of class, was really good. I told myself that this must be a really good class. I felt how lucky I was to be a part of it. And as we went along through the semester, I proved myself right. The environment was very conducive for learning. Being part of this class is really quite an experience. Not just because I got to study math with some of my closest friends from the block, but also because I got to be with people who are really smart and enthusiastic to learn and a teacher who is considerate, caring and who really knows what he is doing and what he is talking about. Don’t get me wrong, I really mean it. I’m saying all of these from the bottom of my heart. The class may not be perfect, but I believe it is really a good class. And that fact enthused me.

The technicalities, the logical analysis, the drills and the sessions every single session is worth the while.

This class is very different to my other classes to be honest. It is only in this class that I could really see a healthy relationship between the teacher and the students. Everyone is willing to compromise for the benefit of the majority. It is also only in this class that I felt the great concern of the teacher to the students. The facebook group is very active. The teacher doesn’t fail to remind his students constantly about his requirements. We’re given good substitute teachers when he can’t make it to class. And I really appreciate the make up classes.

The teacher, being a student himself, really inspired me. His attitude towards his studies and his part-time job, which is teaching us, is exceptional. I think, this is also one of the reasons why the class is doing fairly well. It is because we have a role model, someone to look up to.

For me, the hard lessons, the grades, the strictness and determination of the teacher, the competitiveness of the class… they’re all just pure façade. They’re all just the outsides; they’re all just paint coats. We have to dig deeper to see everything.

Every week, I come to class eager to learn more. I may fall to the temptations of daydreaming or sleepiness from time to time, but I make it a point to cut it at once, as soon as I realize. I try to pay attention as much as I can.

Math 11, for me, is such a pleasant experience. I may not be one of the students who excel anymore, but I’m happy that I’m able to make it through each test successfully. I my fail sometimes, but I am able to pick myself up from it. I learn from my mistakes.

Every meeting, I’m learning more and more. And I’m not just talking about the intellectual and logical aspect, but I believe that through out this course, I also become wiser in life. Math 11 doesn’t only open my eyes to the numeric and logical relevance of the subject alone, it also enhanced my precision and discipline, gearing towards perfection.

As I have always been reminded by my mom, “ Carelessness has no place in Math” that is what I have also realized through personal experience. Math is just not a number-related subject; it is in fact a complete package, because it creates a holistic impact. It develops not only my logical intelligence, it also improved precision, accuracy and discipline as I have mentioned earlier.

Math 11 gave me new perspective in life. It made me realize that it’s not always a win-win situation; you have to work hard to succeed. A brain without action is nothing, determination and hard work is important. With the good teacher who only wants what is best for his students and a class that inspires and motivates is the very reason why I have really enjoyed every lesson learned in my Math 11 course.

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Who I am, who I can be

Who am I?

This is actually a question one asks himself in some point of his life. It may seem to be such a simple question but probably one of the most important questions one might ask himself. We might think we know the answer but then later on we realize that there is still so much to learn.

Before, I didn’t know how it’s like to survive in the real world. I didn’t know how to live independently; I was so reluctant to stand on my own feet; I did not have the confidence to make my own decisions. Before, I didn’t know how to take risks. I felt like I’ve been stuck, always in the safe zone; I was so afraid to trust; I was so afraid to take chances. Before, I didn’t know who I really am. I was so afraid to know who I really am and who I can be.

It was in 2010 when we left the place where I grew up, Cavite. We took our chances and finally took the risk of expanding our horizons. We transferred to Makati. Initially, It’s just to make our lives easier. It’s closer to my mom and dad’s work places and it’s closer to our new church and most importantly to our new schools. For some it may be just that, but for me, it was really something big. I had to give up a lot.  I had to give up my 5 years in my old school, my friends, my classmates, my teachers: everyone I grew up with. I had to give up our old place, the yard, the playground, and the village: everything that had always been there as I was growing up. I had to give up being part of the student council, being feature’s editor in my school paper, things that I have established and most especially my comfort zone.

Ironically, I remember the experience as not very emotional. It was like I was holding back everything. I was just hoping for something good to happen. It was like all the emotions were just hanging, it’s quite hard to explain. At tat stage, I didn’t make any objections or non-conforming remarks, because I knew in my heart that my parents only wanted the best for us.

I transferred school again, after the last time I transferred school about 6 years ago. And it is not just any other school; it is an exclusive school. Coming from a co-ed school, I find it very different. I was in 3rd year high school then when I was introduced to a lot of new things having been enrolled to an all girls school that had really been something new to me. A change of culture was very evident. Not just in terms of the difference of location but also in terms of the school system, not just in terms of the Cavite-Makati difference but also the co-ed-exclusive difference. It was a very different environment. In God’s grace, I have been able to immerse myself into that new culture, which I eventually found even more interesting and challenging. I had the opportunity to gradually get out of my cocoon and spread my wings. That school opened avenues for me to discover what I can be.

The new church, Victory Fort, one of the reasons why we transferred to Makati, was different as well. I felt more at ease with the way people do things. The pastors wear jeans and casual shirts as they preach God’s word in front of everyone, the singers sing conventional songs, not the usual hymnal songs in church, the people are mostly warm and accommodating. It is really fun and cool to be part of it, and I really thought it was really promising. My involvement in the music ministry led to a deeper understanding of myself, of what I can do to please God and make my life worth living.

So there it was, new house; new home, new school; new culture and environment, new church; new me?

Everything was new and everything was unfamiliar. And there I was, asking myself again, who am I and what can I be?

Going to Makati led to finding myself. It opened to a lot of possibilities. Being in a new place allowed me to take risks and expand my horizons. It was a brand new start, so it encouraged me to take chances. I discovered survival in the real world, because I used to be so sheltered back then, but as we’ve moved, things started to ease up. My mom even allowed me to do things that she never approved of back then, like going out with some friends after rehearsals and going home by myself occasionally when she can’t fetch me due to tight schedule. It is really nice to know that I can actually be more than who I used to be in the past.

It led to a deeper understanding of my passion. Well, people who knew me would have known that everything wouldn’t stop in Cavite. I’m very passionate about things that I love doing. I joined the school paper and I discovered I could also write for other sections of paper, not just in features and still it had good feedbacks. I also joined the high school choir in my senior year, where I was appointed to lead the Alto 2 section and I got to compete with the choir in prestigious inter-school competitions for the first time in my life. It was a very fulfilling experience. Also in my senior year, I took my chance to join the annual musical play, the fact that I did not have any acting background never held me back from doing so. I was really surprised when I got the lead part. I discovered so much of me that I didn’t know before we transferred to Makati. And I am so grateful for everything.

It led to a deeper understanding of my faith. Transferring to a new church that opened a lot of possibilities for its members is a very fulfilling experience. I volunteered in the music ministry where I learned I could serve God in whatever way I can. I got to know God deeper and I got to surrender my self whole-heartedly to God. I fully surrendered my life to Him and I also got to share His goodness to the people I care about and to the people I encounter through the life I live.  Yet my involvement in the church also entailed challenges, because being in church doesn’t necessarily mean being away from worldly and superficial people. Dealing with circumstances brought about by people I expected more spiritually mature and more grounded in God’s word is also a purifying experience, leading me steps higher every time I would survive and hold on to my victorious Christian walk in God’s mercy and grace. Being out in the open, prone to all types of temptations and remaining victorious in God’s righteousness is a priceless and matchless experience.

It led to a deeper understanding of me. Having been able to explore more avenues to express my thoughts, my insights and my ideas, I have discovered more of myself. All the more when I have been given the opportunity to develop my God given gifts as I glorify Him in songs, and in the way I handle and manage responsibilities. As I get used to my new environment, my new friends and my new experiences, I realized how beautiful life really is and what I am created for. Just like any other. I have my own perspective of life that is why I am able to say that it is beautiful, but practically, I sometimes wonder why people have different social status and lifestyles, especially when I came to the point of immersion during my High school days. I have witnessed how others suffer and struggle just to be able to provide food on their tables, while others spend their resources on worthless things just for the heck of spending and showing off.

I am blessed to have parents who would do anything just to give us the best in life, I even feel guilty at times when I see them neglecting and setting aside their personal interests just to meet our needs. My mom always tell us that we are able to experience the life that we have not because we are rich, but through God’s grace, because they raise us without anyone’s help, but with God’s divine providence through their efforts. My parents settled down young, and they really have the drive and determination to raise a family on their own in the best way possible, that is why two years after getting married they were already able to acquire our Cavite home,  Crown Asia pioneering project for middle market. They were also able to have their own car and raise both my younger brother and I. As years passed, they raised two more kids making us four; two boys and two girls. We had a very comfortable life back then until we moved to Makati and to our new schools, making our expenses double and some even triple. It had not been very comfortable at start, during the period of adjustment when my mom had to quit her regular job and just take a part time job to spend more time with us leaving my dad with all financial responsibilities. We had to cut on some usual activities such as travels and dine outs.

 “No weapon formed against me shall prosper, all those who rise up against me shall fall, I will not fear what the devil may bring me, I am a servant of God” (Isiah 54:17)

And in Jeremiah, He also assured me of a bright future, that is why whatever comes along my way I remain confident of a good ending. My life is a gift from God, therefore, I must be able to bring back all glory to God, I am a child of God who must keep up to His expectations. My life must be a living bible that is available for everyone to read, that is why I am always accountable for my actions.

Who I really am and who I can really be is actually based on God’s design and plan. And I discover it little by little as I live life in accordance to His will.

My story. This is what makes me, me. I may have known a lot about myself but I am aware that I still have a lot of things to discover. I still have big questions in my life that I have yet to answer. I am nothing but humbled my all these experiences that I have collected and nothing but excited about what God has planned for me.

How techniques affect meaning: An analysis of Jose Garcia Villa’s Poems

An Analysis of Jose Garcia Villa’s poems- And If the Heart Can Not Love, When I Was No Bigger Than A Huge, First, A Poem Must Be Magical, Lyric 17 and Be Beautiful, Noble, Like the Antique Ant

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Jose Garcia Villa, being the first Filipino National Artist for literature and an award-winning poet not just here in Philippines but also in the United States, is known for his “reversed consonance rime scheme” style in writing poetry, wherein, according to Villa: “The last sounded consonants of the last syllable, or the last principal consonant of a word, are reversed for the corresponding rhyme. Thus, a rhyme for near would be run; or rain, green, reign.” He is also popular for his extensive use of punctuation marks, most especially commas. He puts commas after every word, making the reader pause for every word, resulting in slowing the pace of poem. This leads to what Villa called “a lineal dignity of pace and movement“.

A Comma Poet, he is known, with a “ lineal dignity of pace of movement” as his personal take on poetry. What does this phrase really means? How does is principle affect our approach to poetry?

For this paper, I have decided to make an analysis on five of his great works: And If the Heart Can Not Love, When I Was No Bigger Than A Huge, First, A Poem Must Be Magical, Lyric 17 and Be Beautiful, Noble, Like the Antique Ant. These poems exhibit his unusual style in writing poetry, thus giving us a whole new approach in reading poetry. In this paper, I would be analyzing the poems one by one to see what differences his style made on taking poetry.

First: And If the Heart Can Not Love. This poem is one of the first works of Jose Garcia Villa. This poem is a poem about love where the persona talks about things that could happen if the heart cannot love. According to the poem, if the heart cannot love, it becomes hopelessly insensitive to all the beauty that surrounds it. I look at this poem with passion for poetry for in the way Villa has written it, it brings us to the realization that it is not the heart that molds love, it is love that gives significance to the heart. It also gives the idea that he believes strongly to the saying, “it is better to have love and lost, than never to have loved at all”. The poem is presented in a very direct manner. It started the poem with the condition, “And if the heart can not love,” followed by multiple possibilities or effects that could take place if the heart cannot love. The technique he used in this poem made it very simple for the readers to decode the over-all meaning of the poem. The imageries and the figures of speech used were not very complex. His style of writing this poem gave way to the emotion of the poem. It was really evident. The sorrow was felt intensively. He simplified the  poem as a whole to highlight the deeper meaning of the poem; to focus on the weight of emotion presented by the poem.

Secondly, we focus on another poem he had written: When I Was No Bigger Than A Huge. This poem is published in Jose Garcia Villa’s second anthology of poems. This poem is about the persona who is in the midst of reminiscing, as suggested in it’s first line, “When,I,was,no,bigger,than,a,huge.” The second line, “Star,in,my,self,I,began,to,write,” suggests that the persona is maybe in he’s middle age already for it used a star- a star within him. This could suggest that he has reached the point in his life that he has become wise; he has experienced a lot. The fact that that the first line ended with ‘huge’ and the second line started with ‘Star’ emphasizes the difference from then and now, that the persona before is nothing compared to his current state. Noticing the that it is after all a ‘my self’ and not a ‘myself’ shows that the second line is a definition of the persona’s current existence. The next three lines, “My, Theology, Of, rose, and,” leads us to his internalization. The choice of words, the imageries and the figures of speech connected the poem to the Divine. The poem,  as a whole, could be seen as a person’s rediscovery of one’s self, after years of being self-indulgent, and confirmation of the capabilities innate in all of us, overcoming self-doubt and unshakable beliefs. The poem is one of the poems of Villa’s that are classifies as a “Comma Poem.” It is presented in a manner wherein the reader is exposed to an unusual way of reading and/or writing poetry. The structure Jose Garcia Villa had chosen to present the poem, where he placed commas after every word, most of the time without the space as expected, with the objective of gaining a better understanding of the theme and the message of the poem. The technique of dividing the words may lead to a multitude of interpretations.  The commas did not only work as a tool of adjusting the poem’s verbal density and mundane movement, it also gave each word a fuller tonal value, allowing the more precise line movement.

Next, we focus on First, A Poem Must Be Magical. The poem is a presentation of the characteristics of a great poem. Basically, it is an instructional poem about writing a poem. Like the first poem we focused on, it is presented in a direct manner wherein it already stated its main point on the first line clearly that a poem must be magical. Then other characteristics in connection with being magical followed. Notice that the structure of the poem has the traditional rhyme scheme of two consecutive lines: A, A, B, B, C, C, D, D, E, E, F, F, G, G. The imageries, choices of words and figures of speech suggested literal meanings. The structure and the technique made the poem easy to decode. The poem turned out to be an informative one because of the over-all way of writing it.

Then, we go to the fourth poem: Lyric 17. This is a poem is about a persona whou could not see or feel the beauty of life anymore. Unlike the first and the third poem we focused on, this poem is presented in a quite undirected manner. Jose Garcia Villa presented the poem in a specific –to-general structure, wherein he decided to present the things that the persona is undergoing first leading to the over-all conclusion that the persona felt dead. Just like the third poem we analyzed, this poem is written in a structure with the traditional rhyme scheme of two consecutive lines: A, A, B, B, C, C, D, D, E, E, F, F, G, G. Notice that Villa did not finish sentences on every line, instead he divided each sentence into two, presenting the other half of every sentence on succeeding lines connecting them to the first halves of the next sentences. This suggests that Villa is preparing the reader to every revelation of the persona. Though unlike the first and third poem we focused on that it is presented in an undirected manner, like the first and third poems, it is written simply. The technique, the choices of imageries, figures of speech and words are simple. They made it easier for the reader to make sense of the poem as a whole.

Lastly, let us analyze the fifth poem: Be Beautiful, Noble, Like the Antique Ant. This poem, just like the third poem, is somehow instructional and/or informative. The poem is about seeing the importance of little things or creatures in a large world. In this poem, the author did not think of the character of an Antique ant lowly, but instead, he used it as an epitome of what he wants to put across. It is poem suggesting that we should be beautiful, noble and all other characteristics just like the antique ant. It is clear that it uses a commanding tone, suggesting things how can one be like this and that. In terms of structure, it doesn’t follow any conventional form of writing poetry. In some stanzas some lines rhyme, while in some no lines rhyme at all, therefore we can conclude that there really is no rhyme scheme at all. What was very evident in the poem is the use of figures of speech, specifically, metaphor. There were a lot. But though there were a lot of metaphors, the poem wasn’t really hard to understand. The over-all presentation of the poem, though may be quite a mouthful, was quite simple that’s why it is relatively easy to interpret.

Jose Garcia Villa, one of the well-known writers today, really has an eye for poetry. He has a really distinctive take on poetry, which was really evident on all five poems analyzed. His unusual technique and his creative manner of writing and presenting his poems really made a big impact on its readers. In analyzing his poems, the idea that dominated me is that altering the structure of the poem may also result to altering the meaning of the poem. Yes, his poems are unusual, but it is with a purpose. Just like the second poem analyzed. Every comma has a purpose. Putting it after every word has a purpose. The structure, the choices of words, the figures of speech and the imageries all contribute to the over-all meaning of the poem.

Labaw Donggon

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Sa aking unang taon sa kolehiyo, aking nasaksihan ang Labaw Donggon- isang napakagandang dula.

Ang Labaw Donggon ay isang halimbawa ng isang epikong bisaya. Bilang epiko, kinikilala itong isang uri ng panitikan na tumatalakay sa mga kabayanihan at pakikipagunggali ng isang tao laban sa mga kaaway na halos hindi kapani-paniwala dahil sa mga kakaibang tagpuan na puno ng kababalaghan. Bilang epiko, inaasahan ang Labaw Donggon na maging kwento ng ng kabayanihan na punong puno ng mga nakakamamangaha at nakagugulat na mga pangyayari; ito ay isang paglalahad na makabayani.

Ang Labaw Donggon ay kwento ng isang napakakisig na lalaking palaibig; isang romantikong karakter. Si Labaw ay isa sa tatlong anak nina Abyang Alunsina at Buyung Panbari. Naiiba siya dahil nang ipinanganak ito, lumaki ito kaagad. Lumaki siyang matalino, malakas at natuto agad itong magsalita. Siya ay umibig sa tatlong magagandang babae – Sina Anggoy Ginbitan, Anggoy Doroonan, at Nagmalitong Yawa Sinagmaling Diwata. Sunod-sunod niyang sinuyo at pinakasalan nang walang pag-aalinlangan; nang buo ang loob. Handa niyang gawin ang kahit ano at handa siyang lumaban sa kahit kanino makuha lang mga minumutya. Kaiba sa naunang dalawa, si Nagmalitong Yawa Sinagmaling Diwata ay may-asawa. Kasal it kay Buyung Saragnayan. Hindi pumayag si Buyung sa pakiusap ni Labaw, kung kaya’t naglaban sila nito. Nagtagal ang labanan dahil parehong malakas si Buyung at Labaw. Nang mapagod si Labaw, tinali agad ito ni Buyung. Sinabit siya nang parang baboy sa ilalim ng kanilang bahay. Nang mabalitaan ito ng mga anak ni Labaw na sina Baranugan, anak ni Anggoy Doroonan, at Asu Mangga, anak ni Anggoy Ginbitinan, agad silang nagpaalam upang iligtas ang kanilang ama. Dahil sa Lakas ni Buyung, kinailangan nila humingi ng tulong sa mga impakto at sa kanilang lola na si Abyang Alunsina. Sinunod nila ang lahat ng sinabi kung kaya’t nagtagumpay sila sa pagpaslang kay Buyung Saragnayan. Nang mahanap na nila Asu Mangga at Baranugan si Labaw ay nabaliw na ito. Ginamot ito ng kanyang mga asawa paguwi nila.

Kahit ganoon pa man, kahit sa Labaw Donggon ang Bida, mas nagustuhan ko ang karakter ni Buyung Saragnayan. Mas napukaw niya ang atensyon ko’t damdamin, kung kaya’t siya ang naging paborito kong karakter bagamat kaaway ang pagkakakilala sa kanya sa epiko.

Si Buyung Saragnayan ang asawa ni Nagmalitong Yawa Sinagmaling Diwata. S epiko ipinapakilala siya bilang isang kaaway. Siya’y hadlang sa pag-aasam ni Labaw Donggon na mapangasawa si Nagmalitong Yawa Sinagmaling Diwata. Si Buyung Saragnayan ay isang nilalang na napakalakas. Hindi naging madali para kina Labaw Donggon, Asu Mangga at Baranugan ang pakikipagtunggali at pagpapatumba dito.  Maitim man o madilim ang pagpapakilala sa kanya sa epiko, nakuha niya ang aking simpatya. Ito ay sapagkat, para sa aking pananaw, ipinaglalaban lang niya kung ano ang nararapat talaga para sa kanya.

Sa aking palagay, si Buyung Saragnayan ay tumatayong simbolo. Siya ay humahalili sa mga bagay o mg aparte ng pagkatao ni Labaw Donggon na nais niyang malinis. Sa kabilang banda, ang mga nilalang naman na nilabanan ni abaw Donggon, ang mga maiitim na bagay sa dula, ay sumisimbolo naman sa mg aparte ng pagkatao ni Saragnayan.

Si Buyung Saragnayan ang naging daan upang mas makilala ni Labaw Donggon ang kanyang pagkatao. Dahil kay Buyung Saragnayan, napagtanto ni Labaw Donggon ang mga kamalian sa kanyang sarili. Minsann sa buhay, upang may mabuo sa iyong sarili, nararapat na may maguho muna sa iyng sarili. Sa epikong ito, ang elementong ginamit na makapag-guguho sa pagkatao ng pangunahing karakter upang makabuo ng mas mabuting karakter o realisasyon ay si Buyung Saragnayan.

Bakit ba kailangan mamatay ni Buyung Saragnayan?

Sa umpisa pa lang naman, alam na ni Buyung Saragnayan ang kanyang kahahantungan. Alam na niyang siya ay mamatay. Ngunit gayun pa man, pinili pa rin niyang labanan si Labaw Donggn. Ang lahat ng mga pangyayari ay nakalathala na sa tadhana.

Ang kaibahan ng pagnanasa at pag-ibig ay ipina-intindi sa atin ng epiko sa pamamagitan ni Buyung Saragnayan. Malaki ang kaibahan ng dalawang ito. Nalinaw it okay Labaw Donggon ng kamatayan ni Buyung Saragnayan. Naipunto it okay Labaw Doggon ng paghihirap ni Buyung Saragnayan. Ang lahat ng paghihirap ni Buyung Saragnayan ang nagtulak sa pagkamulat ni Labaw Donggon sa katotohanan. Ang pagkamatay ni Buyung Saragnayan ay sumisimbolo sa pagkamatay ng masamang bahagi ng karakter ni Labaw Donggon.

Kung ganoon, maipagtatanto natin na ang tadhana ni Buyung Saragnayan ay nakadugtong sa tadhana ni Labaw Donggon.  Hindi mabubuo ang epiko ng Labaw donggon kung aalisin si Buyung Saragnayan, sapagkat napakalaking parte ng pagkatao ni Labaw Donggon si Buyung Saragnayan.

Kabataang Pilipino ng 1990’s vs. Kabataang Pilipino ngayon

Ito ay may kinalaman sa isa kong post na pinamagatang “Shout out to the 1990’s kids! :D”.  Maaaring masabing karugtong ito. Ang post na ito ay naglalaman ng aking mga repleksyon at realisasyon mula sa post na iyon. 🙂

—————————————————————————————————————–Pagmasdan ang mga kabataan ngayon at alalahanin din ang kalagayan natin noon bilang mga bata ng 1990’s. Kahit pa man kakaunti lang ang agwat, masasabi na malaki ang kaibahang makikita sa mga kabataan ng 1990’s kung ikukumpara sa mga kabataan sa kasalukuyan. Kaalinsabay ng obserbasyong ito, ano-ano pa ang mga patunay ang maaaring maihain para mas mapagtibay ito?

Layunin ng pag-aaral na ito na makita ang mga naging salik ng malawak na agwat ng kabataan ngayon at ng mga kabataan ng 1990’s upang mas maunawaan ang pagkakaiba.

Ang pag-aaral na ito ay nakapokus lamang sa mga kabataan sa Pilipinas; mga pagkakaiba ng mga kabataang Pilipino noong 1990’s at mga kabataang Pilipino ng kasalukuyan.

Ang kabataang Pilipino noong 1990’s at ang kabataan ngayon ay may malaki nang pagkakalayo sa kilos, gawi, ugali, pananamit, damdamin at iba pang mga bagay. Ito ang naging bunga ng mabilis na pagbabago ng mundo at mabilis na pag-usbong ng teknolohiya.

 

Kabataang Pilipino ng 1990’s

Noong 1990’s, masaya sila kapag nakakapaglaro ng ‘Tex’ at ‘Pogs’, kung saan ang kadalasang mga disenyo nito ay yung mga palabas sa TV, mga drama o kaya anime at minsan nga ay may mga dayalogo pa. Uso pa noon ang mga tirador na gawa pa talaga sa sanga ng puno, mga trumpo, at kahit di na gaano kabuhay ang tradisyon ng paglalaro ng mga bata ng mga ‘larong kalye’, tulad ng luksong baka at patintero, may mga gumagawa pa rin ng mga ito, di tulad ngayon kung saan iilan na lamang ang tumatangkilik sa mga ito. Makikita ang mga bata noon na naglalaro ng mga larong tulad ng langit lupa, ice water, taguan, dr. quack quack, tumbang preso, pepsi seven up at agawan base.

Noong 1990’s, bawat batang babae ay may paper dolls na tigpipiso bawat isang set sa sari-sari store. Makikita din ang mga ito na naglalaro ng Chinese garter, 10-20 at jackstone kapag break time.  Bawat babae rin ay nagkaroon ng mga paru-parong pangsipit sa buhok at mga sing-sing na pinauso pa ni Jolina Magdangal. Naging uso rin ang pangongolekta ng mga stationeries. Ilan sa mga uso noon ay ang Papemelroti, Tsukuba at Sashikibuta. Minsan ibinibenta pa nila ang mga ito, minsan naman ay nagpapalitan lang sila. At kung medyo may pera ang pamilya, magpapabili rin sila ng Polly Pocket o di kaya’y Troll collection. Ang mga batang lalaki naman ay siguradong may pellet gun. Humihingi din ang mga ito ng mga tigpipiso sa mga magulang nila para makapaglaro ng video arcade, kung saan ang mga paborito nilang nilalaro ay ang Sonic, Mario, Street Fighter at Tetris. Mayroon din silang mga sapatos na umiilaw ang swelas kapag iniaapak at mas sikat ang mayroong swelas na iba’t iba ang kulay ng ilaw. Bawat batang lalaki din ay siguradong mayroong kahit isang Chicago Bulls na damit sa bahay, kung saan madalas 23 pa ang numerong nakalagay. Uso rin noon ang Swatch watch na may kasama pang guard. Mapa lalaki naman o babae, nauso naman ang roller blades.

Noong 1990’s, pinapapatulog ang mga bata kapag tanghali o hapon para daw lumaki. Noon, sinasabihan ang mga bata ng matatanda na may lalabas na pari, bigas o pagkain sa sugat nila kapag hindi nilagyan ng alcohol, pero ang kahahantungan lamang ng pagtatalo ay ang paglalagay ng betadine.

Noong 1990’s, naglalagay pa ang mga bata ng Kisses sa pencil case nila, o kaya sa isang lalagyan na may bulak at alcohol. Tinutusok pa nila ang mga ito ng  karayom para mabilis manganak.  Sikat noon ang may pencil case na push button na nabubuksan sa dalawang gilid at maraming attachments, tulad ng magnifying lens, book stand, minsan pa nga ay mayroon pang maze sa ibabaw na may maliit na silver na bola, kung saan kinakailangan pang itatagilid ang pencil case para gumulong ang bola, hanggang sa matapos yung maze. Noon, di pa baduy ang pagkakaroon ng  kwadernong may mukha ng artista. Uso rin noon ang pagdadala ng coleman.

Noong 1990’s, nakagawian ang pagsasabi ng “Liars go to hell” kapag pinagdududahang nagsisinungaling ang isa, ”Cross my heart, hope to die” kapag nangangako, “Period no erase” kapag gustong walang kokontra sa kanilang mga sinasabi, ngunit wala silang lusot kapag sasabihan sila ng “Akin yung factory ng pambura”.

Noong 1990’s, pampalipas oras ng mga bata ang paglalaro ng Brick Game. Swerte pa yung may mga advanced version na may tumatagos na blocks para mapuno ang mga puwang sa loob. Yung mga mas nakaaangat naman ay mayroong Tamagotchi na pinapakain, pinapatulog, at inililibing kung namatay na. At yung mga may pera talaga ay mayroon namang Game Boy o Nintendo. Sa mga wala talaga, masaya na sila sa laruan na may tubig sa loob kung saan dapat mai-shoot yung mga bilog sa mga stick na maliliit.

Noong 1990’s, hindi cellphone kundi pager ang pinapangarap ng bawat bata. Nauso ito noong elementarya. Noon, family computer ang gamit sa paglalaro ng mga usong laro tulad ng Mario Bros., Battle City at Rambo. Noon, cassette tape pa ang uso, kaya naman kung may gustong kanta,  kinakailangan pang tantyahin kung ilang segundo ang nakalipas para mapadali ang pagrewind para sa mas mabilis na pagpapaulit-ulit. Pag dating naman sa mga palabas, VHS pa ang uso noon.

Noong 1990’s, hindi ka pinapagalitan ng mga magulang ang mga bata kahit magbabad sa TV, basta ang pinapanood ay Hiraya Manawari, Bayani at Sine Skwela, kung saan nakilala sila Teacher Waki, Ugat Puno, Palikpik, at ang buong barkada na mayroong space ship o jeep na lumilipad. Sinusubaybayan noon ang mga palabas na Ghost Fighter, Dragon Ball, Captain Planet, Shaider, Sailormoon, Daimos at Maskman o Ninja Turtles, kung saan kabisado pa nila ang mga kanta at iniidolo pa ang mga bida. Sikat na sikat rin noon ang Power Rangers. At dahil ditto nagkakasipaan pa ang magkakaibigan dahil nagkukunwari silang sila ang mga ito. Dahil rin dito, tuwang tuwa ang mga bata ng lumabas ang flip phones.

 

Kabataang Pilipino ng Kasalukuyan

Ngayon, wala na gaanong mga palabas na tulad ng Bayani at Sine Skwela, sa halip ay mga palabas na na nakatutugon talaga sa gusto ng nakararami-mga palabas na tungkol sa fashion, musika at iba pa.

Ngayon, masasabing ang mga damit ngayon para sa mga bata ay hindi na gaanong naaangkop sa edad. Karamihan na ng mga tinatangkilik na uri ng damit ngayon ay para mag mukhang mas mature daw kumbaga, sapagkat naiimpluwensyahan narin ng media ang pananamit ng mga bata. Nais ng mga bata ngayon na manamit sa kaparaanang makakasabay sila sa agos ng panahon.

Ngayon, nasa desisyon na ng bata kung matutulog siya ng tanghali o hapon. Hindi na gaanong umuubra ang mga pananakot ng matatanda sa mga bata.

Ngayon, dahil mas mulat na ang mga bata sa mundo, mas nagiging matalino ang mga itong alamin kung ano ang kanilang ayaw at gusto. Mas nagkakaroon na sila ng boses sa mga bagay-bagay.

Ngayon, nakikisabay narin ang mga bata sa pag-unlad ng teknolohiya. Kung dati mga laruan ang hawak ng mga bata ngayon ipad, iphone, cellphone (at minsan hindi lang isa), laptop, mp3, xbox, playstation, wii at mga katulad nito ang hawak. Natututo narin silang mag ‘multi-task’, kung saan habang naglalaro sa laptop o nagfe-facebook o twitter ay nanunuod rin ng TV at nakikinig ng musika. Wala na ngayong kahirap-hirap ang pakikinig ng musika at panunuod ng mga palabas dahil nasa kanila na lahat ng maaaring magamit.

Ngayon, sa halip na lumabas ang mga bata para maglaro o di kaya’y maglaro ng mga simpleg bagay tulad ng tex, pogs at paper dolls, nakatutok ang mga bata sa kanilang mga computer. Bihirang bihira nalang o di kaya’y paminsan-minsan lang makikita ang mga bata ngayon na naglalaro ng mga ito.

Ngayon, nagkalat na ang iba’t ibang social networks sa mga kabataan, kaya naman napakaraming oras ang ginugugol ng mga kabtaan sa pag-upo sa harap ng kanilang mga computer o laptop. Kung iisipin, napakalik ng impluwenya ng internet at mga social media sa kabataan ngayon. Lubos na nabago ng mga ito ang kahulugan ng pagiging bata. Napipilitan ang mga bata ngayon na gumawa ng mga bagay-bagay dahil sa impluwensya ng internet.

 

KONKLUSYON

Sinasabing ang mga kabataan noong 1990’s ay higit na mabait, masunurin at magalang kung ikukumpara sa mga kabataan ngayon. Masasabing lubhang taimtim sa puso’t isipan nila ang kabilang bawat kilos at galaw, hindi tulad ng mga kabataan sa kasalukuyan kung saan mapapansing may mapagwalang-bahala silang saloobin. Lalong masinop sa pag-aayos ng katawan at pananamit at lubhang matapat sa pagsunod sa batas ang mga kabataan noon. Wika nga sa aking mga nabasa, ang kabataan noon ay hubog sa pangaral at kababaang- loob. Ang asal ng mga kabataan noong 1990’s ay maipagmamalaki ng lahat.

Kung susuriin naman ang mga kabataan ngayon. Hindi maikakailang mas naging mulat sila sa makabagong panahon. Mas naging maalam ang mga kabataan ngayon sa mga pangyayari sa paligid. Dahil dito, higit na naging maunlad sa pangangatwiran, na kung minsan ay napagkakamalang pagwawalang-galang sa kapwa. Naging lubhang mapangahas sa mga gawain ang mga kabataan ngayon. Masasabi rin na nahilig sa maraming uri ng paglilibang ang mga kabataan ngayon kung kaya’t mas nakilala nila ang kanilang mga sarili. Ito ang nagbigay daan sa pagbuo ng kanilang mga napakatatayog na mga mithiin at higit na maunlad ang tunguhin.

Gayun pa man, kahit na napakarami na ng naging pagkakaiba ng mga kabataang Pilipino ng 1990’s at mga kabataang Pilipino ng kasalukuyan kahit na hindi naman ganoong kalayo ang agwat, marami rin naman ang naging pagkakatulad. Isa na sa mga ito ang pagiging parehong mabait at masipag.

Ang kabataan ay sinasabing pag-asa ng bayan natin, mapa noon hanggang ngayon. Kapwa sila makabayan, mapagmahal, matulungin sa kapwa at may mga matatayog na mithiin sa buhay. Ang pagkakaiba ay ayon sa lakad ng panahon.

-jooleeyuuh<3

Shout out to the 1990’s kids! :D

Photo 1146

So, I was surfing the net for my Filipino research paper which involves the 90’s kids… Then I saw this.

Nostalgia came over me. It was such a good feeling being able to reminisce; being able to go back to the good times-> CHILDHOOD.

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Everything was so simple back then. I thought, I must share this to all of you too. Feel free to go through this post. If you smiled, laughed or remembered something..HAHA! One thing’s for sure! You are a 90’s kid like me 🙂

Here ya go… This is just a repost, but I added pictures and stuff..haha! enjoy! 🙂

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1. Masaya ka kapag naglalaro ka ng Tex at Pogs. Kadalasan ang design dito ay yung mga palabas sa TV, mga drama o kaya anime, may dialogue pa.

2. May comics pa ang bazooka. Kahit di mo maintindihan yung Fortune Cookie sa huli ay collection mo pa rin yun.

3. Uso pa yung tirador, yung gawa talaga sa sanga ng puno.

4. Ang mga babae naglalaro ng paper dolls na tigpipiso bawat isang set sa sari-sari store.

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5. Kung lalake ka, siguradong may pellet gun ka.

6. Humihingi ka ng dalawang piso sa magulang mo para maglaro ng video arcade sa sari-sari store. Favorite mo yung Sonic, Mario at Street Fighter at Tetris.

7. Nagwa-watusi ka kapag New Year kahit pinapagalitan ka ng nanay mo.

8. Meron kang sapatos na umiilaw yung swelas kapag iniaapak mo. Mas sikat kung iba-iba yung kulay.

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9. Merong at least isang Chicago Bulls na shirt sa bahay nyo. Madalas number 23 pa yung nakalagay.

10. Pinapatulog ka ng yaya/nanay mo tuwing tanghali o hapon para raw lumaki. Hindi na kasi pinapatulog ang mga bata ngayon tuwing tanghali di tulad nung panahon natin.

11. Sinasabihan ka ng matatanda na may lalabas na pari o bigas sa sugat mo kapag hindi nilagyan ng alcohol pero in the end, betadine lang ang magpapatahimik sa inyo.

12. Kung babae ka, nagkaroon ka ng butterfly hairclips/rings. (si Jolina ang nagpauso nito)

13. Kung medyo may pera ang pamilya nyo, nagpabili ka ng Polly Pocket.

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 14. Naglalagay ka ng Kisses (yung mabango) sa pencil case mo, o kaya sa isang lalagyan na may bulak, alcohol at tinutusok ng karayom para mabilis manganak.

15. May free stickers ng Disney movies sa loob ng Maggi noodles.

16. Pinapatunog mo yung takip ng Gatorade.

17. Ang mga stationeries na uso: Papemelroti, Tsukuba, Sashikibuta. Pwedeng ibenta, pwedeng trade lang.

18. Pampalipas oras mo dati ang paglalaro ng Brick Game, at swerte yung mga may advanced version na may tumatagos na blocks para mapuno na yung gap sa loob. Mas advanced ka kung Tamagotchi ang nilalaro mo. Pinapakain mo, pinapatulog mo, at inililibing mo kung namatay na. At kung talagang kaya nyong bumili, Game Boy ang sayo. Pero kung wala ka talaga, yung laruan na lang na may tubig sa loob tapos dapat ma-shoot mo yung mga bilog sa stick na maliit.

19. Bago magsimula ang klase, nakikilaro ka muna sa 10-20, jackstone, langit lupa, ice water, taguan, dr. quack quack, tumbang preso, pepsi seven up at agawan base. Di bale nang madumi na ang uniform mo pagpasok ng classroom.

20. Sinasabi mo sa kaklase mo na “Liars go to hell” kapag tingin mo nagsisinungaling sya. ”Cross my heart, hope to die” kapag nangangako ka. “Period no erase” kapag gusto mo walang kumontra sayo. Kaya lang wala kang lusot kapag sinabi ng kaklase mo na “Akin yung factory ng pambura”.

21. Sikat ka pag ang pencil case mo nabubuksan sa dalawang side taposmaraming attachments like magnifying lens, book stand, compartments na maliliit tapos push button pa. Minsan sa ibabaw ng pencil case meron pang maze, may maliit na silver na bola tapos itatagilid mo yung pencil case para gumulong yun, hanggang sa matapos yung maze.

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22. Di ka baduy kung ang notebook mo nung elementary ay may mukha ng artista

23. Sa coleman mo inilalagay ang tubig na baon mo sa school.

24. Nagpabili ka ng Baby-G sa magulang mo.

25. Elementary ka nung nauso ang pager. Yun pa ang pinapangarap ng mga bata, hindi pa cell phone.

26. Meron ka pa rin ng pinakamalaking cell phone na nakatago na ngayon sa mga kahon.

27. Wala pang PS/PS2, XBox, Wii, atbp. noon. Family Computer pa lang, yung cartridge yung bala. Usong laro ang Mario Bros., Battle City at Rambo.

28. Meron ka ng isa sa mga ito: Family Computer, Nintendo, Sega, roller blades, brick game, Tamagochi, Swatch Watch w/ matching guard, Troll collection.

29. Alam mo ang mga linyang ito sa mga kanta: “Natatawa ako, hi hi hi hi”, “Anong paki mo sa long hair ko”, “Dahil sa bawal na gamot”, “Mga kababayan ko, bilib ako sa kulay ko”.

30. Isa dito ay theme song mo: “I Swear” by All 4 One, “What’s Up” by 4 Non Blondes (Andsay, Hey ey ey ey ey ey. I said hey, What’s goin on!), “Zombie” by Cranberries.

31. Sumasayaw ka ng Macarena.

32. Alam mo ang kanta ng Spice Girls at may favorite ka sa kanila. Kung fan ka talaga, may poster ka pa at casette tape ka pa nila.

33. Malamang ay naging fanatic ka ng isa sa mga sumikat na boy bands.

34. Ang tinutugtog lagi sa radyo ay mga kanta ng mga banda gaya ng Eraserheads, Parokya ni Edgar nung nagpapalda pa lang sila, Alamid, Rivermaya, True Faith, The Youth, Afterimage at kung anu-ano pang pinoy bands.

35. Tape pa ang uso, di CD or MP3 players. Pag gusto mo yung kanta kailangan tantyahin mo kung ilang seconds i-rewind yun para mabilis paulit-ulitin.

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36. Kinakanta nyo dati sa school yung “Heal the World”, “Tell the World of His Love”, “Jubilee Song”, etc.

37. Nanonood ka dati ng Power Rangers, Captain Planet o Ninja Turtles. Nagkukunyari pa kayo ng mga kaibigan mo na kayo yun at nagkakasipaan kayo.

38. Di ka papagalitan ng magulang kahit magbabad ka sa TV, basta ang pinapanood mo ay Hiraya Manawari, Bayani at Sine Skwela, kung saan nakilala mo sila Teacher Waki, Ugat Puno, Palikpik, at ang buong barkada nila lalo na kapag nakasakay sila sa space ship o  sa jeep na lumilipad.

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39. Sinubaybayan mo ang Ghost Fighter at ang Dragon Ball. Naging favorite mo si Eugene at si Goku.

40. Niloloko mo yung theme song ng Voltes V kasi di mo maintindihan yung theme song: ”Tato ni Ara Mina malaking cobra…”, “Boltes Payb lima sila, pumunta sa kubeta…”, ”…Kontra Bulate!”

41. Napanood mo din yung ibang anime tulad ng Shaider, Sailormoon, Daimos at Maskman. Saulo mo pa nga yung kanta dun: “Oh maskuman kayo ang pag-asa.. Iligtas kami sa marahas na kadiliman… Kami inyong ipaglaban! Sugod, sugod laban maskuman, ipaglaban nyo ang katarungan.. Sige, sige laban maskuman..”

42. Sinubaybayan mo ang Sarah ang Munting Prinsesa, Julio at Julia, at Cedi. Pinanood mo pa nga yung movie version ng Sarah ang Munting Prinsesa with Camille Prats.

43. Alam mo din yung “Ang Pulubi at ang Prinsesa” with Camille Prats and Angelica Panganiban.

44. Gusto mong sumali sa ANG TV. Pero alam mong hindi na pwede. kaya kuntento ka na lang sa panonood nito tuwing 4:30 ng hapon.

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45. Batibot ang usong palabas. Akala mo nga mag-dyowa o mag-asawa sina Kuya Bodjie at Ate Sheena.

46. Alam mo yung tono ng pinausong kanta ng show na “ATBP.”: Isa.. dalawa-tatlo.. apat-lima.. anim-pito-walo.. syam-sampu… labingisa-labingdalawa… labingtatlo… labingapat-labinglima…

47. Napanood mo ang Batang X.

48. Sabay kayo nanonood ng yaya mo ng Marimar.

49. Nanonood ka ng kahit alin dito: “Okay Ka Fairy Ko”, “Oki Doki Doc”, “Abangan ang Susunod na Kabanata”, “Palibhasa Lalake”, “Ober da Bakod”, at “Home Along Da Riles”.

50. Galit ka kay Clara kasi sobra naman talaga sya mang-api kay Mara.

51. Pinanood mo din yung “Villa Quintana”, “Esperanza”, “Anakarenina” atbp.

52. Mga love teams na nagpakilig sayo: Juday and Wowie. Jolina and Marvin.

53. Alam mo yung commercial ng Tender Juicy hotdog na ganito: “Dear diary, Carlo sat beside me today. He’s so cute! Sabi niya I’m pretty kaya lang I’m fat.”

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54. Kinakanta mo yung “Thank God it’s Sabado, pati na rin Linggo…” at “Isa pa, isa pa, isa pang Chicken Joy”.

55. Nasa channel 2 pa ang Eat Bulaga at ang Mel and Jay.

56. Nakikita mo sa balita na may mga kultong nagtatago na sa kweba, kasi magugunaw na ang mundo sa year 2000, at yung mga computer daw bigla na lang mag-shu-shut down at mawawala na daw ang technology.

57. Chinese variety shows ang palabas tuwing umaga ng linggo.

58. Matapang ka kung napanood mo lahat ng Shake, Rattle and Roll movies.

59. Narinig mong i-announce sa radyo yung death ni Princess Diana. Biglang nauso yung kanta ni Elton John na “Goodbye, England’s Rose.”

60. Nasa VHS yung mga movies na pinapanood ninyo sa bahay.

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61. Kung babae ka, naging crush mo si Leonardo di Caprio dahil sa Titanic. Kaya nga lang, bawal ka pa tumingin sa kissing scenes nina Jack at Rose. Haha.

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-jooleeyuuh<3

Who am I?

Who am I?

This is actually a question one asks himself in some point of his life. It may seem to be such a simple question but probably one of the most important questions one might ask his self. We might thought we know the answer but then later on we realize that there is still so much to learn.

Who am I?

One should understand one’s self in order to move forward. One must know his self in order to grow. One must dig deep in his self in order to know what makes him, him.

What makes you, you?

What makes me, me?

I wonder.

Do I really know myself?

Who am I?

Well I am an appreciative and free spirit person. It’s not really hard to please me. Being in a family with close bonds, being the only child for two years and growing up with three siblings, I feel loved everyday, which is why I look at things at a brighter light. I love to laugh even at the most stupid things and at the corniest jokes. I love smiles for they brighten up my day. I can be random and weird at times. I love bonding times, sight seeing, looking at the clouds during the day and the stars at night. I love to play with kids and converse with old people. I cherish memories through pictures, blogs and journals. I am a person who appreciates art, music and creativity. I love listening to and making music, watching movies and random videos, appreciating food, beauty, and nature, getting to know people, taking pictures, serving God, being with my family, having adventures, reading books, writing songs and stories, and learning something new.

A dreamer…

A fashion enthusiast…

A foodie…

A performer…

A writer…

Who am I?

I like to think that I am a person with a strong foundation of values and principles. I am very reflective. I think things through. Growing up with understanding and hands on parents and volunteering in church, I formed my own set of values ad principles. Even though I’m in college already, I see to it that I won’t break them and so far, I’m pretty successful. I don’t fall to temptations and peer pressures easily. I stand on my ground.

Who am I?

Growing up with a supportive family, I become a person who is not afraid to take risks because I don’t want to ask myself later on the question, ‘What if?’ This is the reason why I already have a good share of experiences, lessons, failures and successes. I can be competitive. If I know I have a good chance at something or I really like to try something, I do it. I live with no regrets. I don’t like to have regrets.

Who am I?

I am a person who learned to put her guard up. I used to be really gullible; a person who trusts easily. And I have been failed a lot of times. People have fooled me, I have been used, I have been taken advantage of and I have been broken hearted. Thus, It takes a while for me to warm up now. But I thank God for these experiences have made me stronger and wiser.

Who am I?

I’ve been thinking a lot lately… about who I am and who am I going to be. I grew up knowing what I want to be and what I want to do with my life… But then, as I grow old, I learn that I don’t know what I want with myself anymore or rather, I don’t know if I can make it. I find myself lost. I began to realize, maybe I am not able to find myself yet. But then, I saw this quote:

“People often say that this or that person has not yet found himself. But the self is not something one finds, it is something one creates.” – Thomas Szasz

It hit me. I have to take charge of my life. Going with the flow wouldn’t do anymore. Nothing would happen with my life if I would just let my life pass.

Who am I?

I am a 17 year old, AB COM freshman student at the Ateneo de Manila University and the eldest among 4 children of an engineer and a businesswoman. Through the years, I’ve been a consistent honor student, who excels in whatever I put my heart into. I’ve got a bright future in front of me, I know. That’s the reason why I am really nervous with my life. I know that much is expected of me. I, myself, also expect a lot of myself because of my achievements. I know that I have and what I can give yet I know that I don’t have the confidence. I have these insecurities and doubts, especially with my personality, because of the fact that I’m not really outgoing but instead more of an introvert.

However, I am very thankful that I have God, who’s always there for me. He makes me feel secure. And I know with Him, I would be at my best.

My story. This is what makes me, me. I may have known a lot about myself but I am aware that I still have a lot of things to discover. I still have big questions in my life that I have yet to answer. I am nothing but humbled my all these experiences that I have collected and nothing but excited about what God has planned for me.